Feelings!

Once there was a very small person who had feelings. They had many feelings and felt them every day. Their family liked them when they showed their feelings, so the very small person started to wear their feelings on their sleeve. One day one of the small person's parents said that they didn't like to see the FEAR feeling any more, so the small person tried to pull it off. The parent said that they would give the small person some TOUGH to cover over their FEAR. The small person found it very difficult to cover the FEAR with the TOUGH, so the other parent and the grandparents all helped. It took many days. "Now you look wonderful," said the parents when it was done. "We've covered some of your FEARS with TOUGH, and you'll grow into a strong person."

The small person grew a little older and found a friend. The friend also wore their feelings on their sleeve. The friend said one day, "My parents want me to cover up my LONELY feelings, and to be different from now on." And they were. The small person decided to cover over their LONELY feelings too, and they got ANGRY from another adult. The small person put big patches of ANGRY on top of their LONELY. It was hard work to cover over the LONELY feelings.

One day when the small person (who was now not so small) went to school some of their LONELY feelings started to show. So the teacher kept them behind and gave them some GUILT to cover their LONELY feelings. Sometimes when alone at night the person would look at their feelings. The would pull off the TOUGH and ANGRY and GUILT to look at their LONELY and FEAR. Then they would have to take a long time putting the TOUGH, ANGRY and GUILT back again.

One night the person noticed that their LONELY and FEAR were growing, and beginning to stick out from under the patches. So the person had to go out to find some more ANGRY to cover the LONELY, and got all the TOUGH that their parents could spare to cover their FEAR.

The person grew older and became very popular because everyone said that they could hide their feelings well. The person's parents said one day that they had a PROUD feeling because the person had been so TOUGH. But the person could not find anywhere to put the PROUD feeling because the TOUGH was getting so big. The person had trouble finding room on their sleeve for any other feelings - the TOUGH and the ANGRY were all that showed.

Then after a time the person met another person and they became friends. They thought that they were a lot alike because they both had only TOUGH and ANGRY feelings that showed. One day the friend told the person a secret: "I'm not really like you - my TOUGH and ANGRY are only patches to cover over my LONELY and my FEAR." The friend pulled back the edge of their TOUGH and showed the person their FEAR; just for a second.

The person sat quietly and did not speak. Then carefully they too pulled back the edge of their TOUGH and showed their FEAR. The friend saw the LONELY underneath. Then the friend gently reached out and touched the person's FEAR, and then the LONELY....... The friend's touch was like magic. A feeling of ACCEPTANCE appeared on the person's sleeve, and the TOUGH and ANGRY had become smaller. The person then knew that whenever someone gave them ACCEPTANCE, they would need less TOUGH, and then there would be more room to show PROUD..... SAD ....... LOVING.... STRONG.... GOOD.... WARM... HURT... FEAR....

Important Notice

I have struggled in getting a title for this post. This is because it is difficult to summarize what I want to talk about.

Read the sentences below and take time to 
feel them. Feel each sentence independently without being influenced by the previous one.

1.  You are not important.
2. Are you really important?
3. You are important!
4.  You are really important.

I hope you have managed to feel each sentence independently. The truth is, the feeling you felt about the first sentence influenced the others. To most of us, the first sentence kinda really penetrated inside, making the rest unimportant!

Before coming up with this exercise, I was analyzing how most people feel about being important. One thing I realized is that most people’s importance is affirmed by other people, especially people we look up to. We all speak to ourselves, affirming who we are. But have you realized how sometimes our own voice is not as powerful as the voice of others?

We have all struggled with a notorious mosquito. The kind of mosquito that makes you wonder, are mosquitoes important? And as much as we might feel as if mosquitoes are not important, their importance is not determined by our opinion of the same.

Some people don’t feel as if they are important. Yet if you told them in the face that they are not important, affirming their inner voice, they would get really offended and become defensive, a feeling produced by the first sentence above.

Other people really feel important. And most of these people feel important because of something external. An accomplishment, a recognition, a status or something. And if a stranger who was not aware of who they are came and told them in the face that they are important, it would feel awkward. This is because their importance is tied to something known. And if they lost that thing, they would feel unimportant.

It therefore seems the issue of importance is really a personal issue. And when I was thinking about it on a personal level, I realized how unimportant I have felt because my inner voice was not as powerful as the external voices. It is as if someone telling me am important has a greater value than I, who knows myself better, telling it to myself. And to some extent I would find myself wanting to hear someone tell me I am important.

And imagine if I had titled this blog post with either of the four sentences. Had I titled it.. You are not important.. Those I know and who expect me to know they are important would have felt bad, those who are doubting their importance would have sought to look for an affirmation and those who I don’t know would have wanted to prove that I am wrong. Had I titled this blog post.. You are important, those I know, seeking an affirmation would have felt really good to read on, those who I don’t know and they feel important would have ignored while most people would think it is just a cliché.

Now, what if I had titled it… I am not important… So many of you would feel so sorry for me… and wonder why I feel this way. Others would actually agree.

The essence of this post is to encourage you to know that you are important. And your importance is not pegged to something external as much as is, your intrinsic value. We should learn to believe in who we are and be impervious of the external voices that may or may not agree with us. We should give more weight to the voice in our heart more than the voice of others. That our importance is first and foremost ours to feel, to know, to be.

Could it be being that being important is not something to feel? Could it be something to know, like head knowledge? Just a thought.

Are you important? You tell it to yourself!

Simplify your life

It is very unfortunate that as human beings we have made life very complicated. Just check how many of your friends on facebook have their status as it's complicated and you will understand what I mean. The issue is not even relationships but generally life has become complicated.

I was sharing with a friend who was looking for closure on the issue of his dad. His dad left them when they were young and he has never forgiven him or even understood why God allowed that. And he has been carrying very heavy burdens, hurts and pains of the past. He has lived his life from the past. Looking at himself as a victim of circumstances and as a reject of life. The worst past was that he actually hated the other children who his father got from a relationship with another woman because he believes they stole from him what was rightful his.

I must say, such situations are tough and painful. When you ask yourself what it could have been had your dad been there for you. Painting all the pictures in the mind of what you missed and how you could have been a better person had your dad been there. And such mental pictures on add agony to life making the burden of the past just more unbearable.

Luckily for me when we were having our meeting, another friend of mine came and joined in the fellowship. And as we were sharing he happened to be a child of another woman. (I hope you get the picture). This guy was raised by a man who neglected his rural family and got a new wife in the city and got children and life continued. I thank God because he is a God of purpose.

And as we were fellowship, now having a deeper sight into life, we realized that there are so many things in life that we have no control of.  There are things that were done to you, that hurt you and brought much pain, but that is past and you know it was beyond you then. But now that you are here what are you doing about it?

It is so easy to carry heavy loads with us all our lives, blaming circumstances, blaming people and wishing it was better. But wisdom dictates we lay our past down and decided to live our lives all a new; to start all over again, to be grateful that we are here and that we have the power to change our future. To focus on what we can do now with what we have than to keep complaining of things we didn’t have.

Jesus says that his yoke is easy and his burden is light, that He came to give us a new life, an abundant life. And as we focus on the plans He has for us it will be easy to let go of our burdens, of our hurts and of our pains and to allow Him to breath in us a new life and a new ability to forget the past and focus on the future.

And that is how to simplify your life. To understand that today is the first day of your life, that today you can start all over again, that today you can write a different story out of your life. It is not easy but it is possible to live a simple life.

Let go of the past and its burdens and press on to your place of glory in God.

Aint Just a Hanger

You watch me as I gracefully glide through the run way

You admire the way the piece of art perfectly fits in my body

You wish you could the same way bring it out.

And as I turn, and sway, and pose

You applause and sarcastically clap

You think am just a piece of hanger

Aint just a hanger

But a package of beauty

Oozing from within to the outside.

And as I run through the run way

Let it run in your mind

Am not just a hanger

I was a Stranger

In the rural area it is very easy to entertain strangers. You can easily step into a homestead and ask for a mug of water, and you will be given. However, in the urban centers, we hardly even talk to our next door neighbor leave alone a stranger. But I can’t blame the urban folk, they have reasons to be careful.

I was considering Matthew 25:43 which says; I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, as a basis for judgment when Christ will be back and I was challenged. When Jesus talks about a stranger, we more often than not think of a stranded someone in the estate who cannot find house number Y17, or an old man in town who is looking for Chester house and when we offer help, in our mind we always know we have let in a stranger. And as much as that is true I also discovered something else.

When we talk of a stranger, it is someone who does not share your value system. A stranger is someone who you would seek to disassociate because of their beliefs, their behaviors and their habits. And we have enough strangers in the world. But as believers what are we doing about them? Do we extend our love to such folk? Or we just look at them from a far and pity them? Or maybe just pray? But how will they know if we don’t talk to them? How will they know if we don’t reach out to them in love.

Jesus demonstrated the kind of open heart we should, yet we must guard not to be swallowed since bad company corrupts good morals. But we cannot keep safe by keeping away. We need to develop a capacity to interact with the strangers and influence them positively. When I look at Jesus, he was able to converse with a Samaritan woman who was a manizer, and she was never the same again. He would interact with a tax collector and influence them for the kingdom. That is the capacity I am talking about.

There are people who are lost and in going through different issues in life. We have prostitutes, thieves, homosexuals, witches, drunks and even murders, and I have met some who would love to come and join the kingdom, but they don’t know where to start. They are strangers looking to be let in, but what do we do? We judge them, we throw them out, even those who have been converted, we see them from their past, not for what they could become. And they keep feeling as strangers. And within no time, they just find they cannot fit in.

What manner of love is this, that even when we were sinners, Jesus loved us and died for us? That is the kind of love we need to have. To love the sinners and open our homes (lives) for them. And though we would wish they converted and left their ways, it may take more time than we think. So, let’s just plant the right seeds and God, who makes rain fall to both the righteous and the sinners, will water the seeds and in due time, our efforts will not be in vain.

Which stranger are you not letting in? Let us not be the lot who will be saying on judgment day, ⁴⁴ “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’   ⁴⁵ “He will reply, ‘truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’  ⁴⁶ “Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.” Mat 25: 44-46  NIV

Do you know Zephaniah?

How many of you have read the book of Zephaniah in the bible? Let me see by the show of hands. I can bet very few of us have. But who wants to read a book that starts with words like I will sweep away everything from the face of the earth declares the Lord? That’s not the kind of words we want to hear. Zephaniah is one of the prophets and he was just doing his work, don’t take it personal.

I was just imagining when you get to heaven and then after shaking hands and hugging your favorite guys like Abraham and then Zephaniah comes over to say hi, what kind of conversation would you have? Hey, am Zephaniah, how did you find my book? Zepha what? Which book? For heaven’s sake, kindly read that book, and avoid such embarrassments in heaven.

Not everything we do will be noticed, but that doesn’t mean it’s not important. We have a culture that promotes feedback and rating. But one thing I have come to learn about feedback and rating, they have become a way of seeking validation. I have been a victim of this. When I do an article and I open my blog just to find ten page reviews. And at time I get discouraged and I feel like what I am doing is worthless. Or when no one comments on anything and I feel like am shallow.

I have also noticed how sometimes I want to be rated. What do people think about me and stuff? And then I got to think about Zephaniah, what does he feel when he sees most Christians have no interest in his book. I mean, when was the last time you heard someone quote from the book of Zephaniah?

What am I saying? Sometimes God will give you tasks and you will not have a chance to get feedback or rating. You will remain in the dark without knowing how you are doing. But that should not stop you or discourage you. Keep doing your assignment and leave the rest to God.

It’s like when you witness and share the word of the Lord with someone, and no one seems to ever accept Christ from you preaching to them. How does that make you feel? Remember its God who saves. Just plant the seed and God will water it, don’t concern yourself with that which is not important or within your jurisdiction. And when we learn that, we shall not water down the word of God to try and accommodate the world. We shall just do our part, knowing that Jesus is able to save people his own way, without compromising his word. And if you have been feeling like all you have been doing is fruitless, keep on keeping on. Be a faithful steward, your reward is with God.

Feelings!

Once there was a very small person who had feelings. They had many feelings and felt them every day. Their family liked them when they showed their feelings, so the very small person started to wear their feelings on their sleeve. One day one of the small person's parents said that they didn't like to see the FEAR feeling any more, so the small person tried to pull it off. The parent said that they would give the small person some TOUGH to cover over their FEAR. The small person found it very difficult to cover the FEAR with the TOUGH, so the other parent and the grandparents all helped. It took many days. "Now you look wonderful," said the parents when it was done. "We've covered some of your feelings with TOUGH, and you'll grow into a strong person."

The small person grew a little older and found a friend. The friend also wore their feelings on their sleeve. The friend said one day, "My parents want me to cover up my LONELY feelings, and to be different from now on." And they were. The small person decided to cover over their LONELY feelings too, and they got ANGRY from another adult. The small person put big patches of ANGRY on top of their LONELY. It was hard work to cover over the LONELY feelings.

One day when the small person (who was now not so small) went to school some of their LONELY feelings started to show. So the teacher kept them behind and gave them some GUILT to cover their LONELY feelings. Sometimes when alone at night the person would look at their feelings. The would pull off the TOUGH and ANGRY and GUILT to look at their LONELY and FEAR. Then they would have to take a long time putting the TOUGH, ANGRY and GUILT back again.

One night the person noticed that their LONELY and FEAR were growing, and beginning to stick out from under the patches. So the person had to go out to find some more ANGRY to cover the LONELY, and got all the TOUGH that their parents could spare to cover their FEAR.

The person grew older and became very popular because everyone said that they could hide their feelings well. The person's parents said one day that they had a PROUD feeling because the person had been so TOUGH. But the person could not find anywhere to put the PROUD feeling because the TOUGH was getting so big. The person had trouble finding room on their sleeve for any other feelings - the TOUGH and the ANGRY were all that showed.

Then after a time the person met another person and they became friends. They thought that they were a lot alike because they both had only TOUGH and ANGRY feelings that showed. One day the friend told the person a secret: "I'm not really like you - my TOUGH and ANGRY are only patches to cover over my LONELY and my FEAR." The friend pulled back the edge of their TOUGH and showed the person their FEAR; just for a second.

The person sat quietly and did not speak. Then carefully they too pulled back the edge of their TOUGH and showed their FEAR. The friend saw the LONELY underneath. Then the friend gently reached out and touched the person's FEAR, and then the LONELY....... The friend's touch was like magic. A feeling of ACCEPTANCE appeared on the person's sleeve, and the TOUGH and ANGRY had become smaller. The person then knew that whenever someone gave them ACCEPTANCE, they would need less TOUGH, and then there would be more room to show PROUD..... SAD ....... LOVING.... STRONG.... GOOD.... WARM... HURT... FEAR....