Sometimes

Sometimes we don't get enough
And we are okay
Other times we get enough
And worst still is when enough
Is not enough

Sometimes we don't do our best
And we are okay
Other times we do our best
Worst still is when our best
Is not enough

That I May Understand

I was going through the story of Easter in the bible just to conect with the reason for the season and I must say I was refreshed. When Christ died, in John 21 we find that Peter who was one of the key disciples had actually returned to fishing. I mean, that was so soon. He should have waited for a week or something. But I love the realness of Peter, he is rational and practical. But the problem with this is, following God needs faith, and faith always beats rationalism and practicality of things. So he had to be transformed to walk in faith more than sight. And the best thing is Jesus didn't give up on him. The bible actually titles this passage; and Jesus reinstates Peter.

The best thing about God is that He calls to use us the way we are. But as we walk with him he transforms us into men and women of faith. So we can never give up on ourselves. We have to believe that God is able to use us the way we are, and better still he is able to transform us into what he has in mind. And in our walk with him, who we are will most times conflict with who God wants us to become.

The guys on the way to Emmaus walked with the risen Jesus without realising who he was. I learnt it is very easy to walk with Christ and miss him. I mean, he was just another guy on the road until he broke bread. And I know many times I have walked with Christ and missed his reality. And as I was reflecting about Easter my prayer has been that God may open my eyes.

When Jesus appeared to the disciples before ascension, he made a statement that transformed me. He said, haven't you understood the scriptures? I was to die and arise again. He then gave them understanding of scriptures as they wait for the Holy Spirit for power. Have you ever struggled with faith? When the word does not make sense? When you can't understand the reality of God? I have been there. And this part of scripture really encouraged me. That indeed it is God himself who increases our faith. It is God himself who gives us understanding of scripture. And so I have been praying that indeed God may open my eyes, increase my faith, give me understanding of scripture and empower me by his spirit.

I just want to know Christ and the glory of his resurrection.

Most Likely Religion Will Take You To Hell

When Jesus came to earth, he threatened the political class and the religious zealots. Herod actually killed all the boys below the age of two years targeting to kills Jesus while he was a baby. And the religious zealots managed to have him killed as an adult.

Why would the political class get threatened by the birth of a little boy? It’s because the Kingdom of God is concerned with how the affair of nations are run, since the systems in a country and the world at large affect the people of God. And with this I don’t mean Christians, I mean the people. And Jesus is concerned whether people are getting abundant life and justice in everyday life.

The religious zealots were also threatened by Jesus because he brought a higher order that required a change of heart posture and a shift in the prevailing mentality. Though the religious people sought God, they had become so engrossed in doing things for the wrong reasons and had missed the essence of faith in their generation. They catch a woman committing adultery and they are so fast to stone him and they wanted Jesus to be part of that. By the way who was the guy and where was he?? This picture among others shared in the gospel demonstrates what religion is capable of.

Jesus did not come to establish any religion, but rather a lifestyle that points people to his father (God). His miracles were not to enrich himself but to make the lives of other people better. His judgments were not to humiliate and embarrass people, but to expose the mentalities that hindered the people from accessing the Kingdom of God. It’s Jesus who was telling the religious people that thieves, prostitutes and tax collectors are entering the Kingdom before them. This demonstrates that the kingdom of God is beyond a religious structure.

The other day I was just thinking about faith and the question was what is the best faith? I believe the best faith is the one that brings you closest to God, makes you a better person, a more sensible person, a more loving person, a more humanitarian person, a more responsible person, a more ethical person. A person who lives in harmony with nature and that has the best desires for others.

Why do I say the best desires for others? Let us consider what Jesus demonstrated at the cross. When he was carrying the suffering of the whole world and two thieves were there receiving justice, he forgot all that and received the thief who requested for a place in his kingdom. Even at that moment, of the climax for his coming to earth, he still desired the best for a person whose life had produced nothing much but shame and disappointment.   

And that is my point. Religion will most likely take you to hell. Have you read Mathew 25 where Jesus says go away you evil doers, I didn’t know yo? The people who actually get chased away in this context are the religious loot. Because they start narrating how they did great wonders in the name of Jesus, and yet he tells them off.

I believe religion is manmade; it is not from God. It produces a people who are self centered, fearful and detached from the realities of life, who would rather scare people about hell than demonstrate the love of heaven. Who sneer at prostitutes and call homosexuals names instead of spreading the good news of the gospel.

 And as we talk about the good news, you should ask yourself if your faith produce good news to those in the dark; and not just news about a future event but good news about their life on earth. And when you go back to Mathew 25, those who join at the banquet are those that had good news to strangers, to the homeless, to the naked and such.

My point is, faith is done, lived and felt. And as we seek to find God, we should know that he has a greater agenda than ourselves that connects to all humanity. And so we are called to partner with him to reach out to those oppressed by different systems in the world and to point them to God. And if God is love, then to say we know God is to say we know how to love. And if Love conquers all, then our work is to spread love.

Something is Terribly Wrong…. Ha ha ha ha

Have you ever found yourself on the wrong and the only thing you do is laugh at yourself? I have, severally. I actually laugh at myself more than any other person does. It is because I appreciate my stupidity once in a while when I get on a stupid mode.

I think something is terribly wrong somewhere. If indeed the word of God is true and if I say that I believe in that word, why then am I stressed up chasing and looking for these things? Didn’t he say they will be added unto us?

Don’t get me wrong, we have to chase after our dreams, and I encourage everyone of us to do so. We have to do these things but not at the expense of the kingdom. The first question we need to ask ourselves is why we are chasing after our dreams.

We have basic needs but life cannot just be about these needs. Life is much more than this. The kingdom of God is not just about going to heaven, it is about the people. That they may have abundant life on earth and that there may be hope and joy.

So, if life is more than our needs and the Kingdom of God is more than going to heaven, we must then understand Mathew 6:33. Seek first the Kingdom of God and it’s righteousness and these things will be added to you. The thing is, when we focus on meeting the needs of other people, which should be the reason for every business or career, and then in essence we are seeking the kingdom. But our careers and our businesses have become just means to serve us and we do not care about people. We have become oppressors of those we say we are serving and that is what is terribly wrong. Does what we do bring hope to the world?

You might say your career does not allow you to oppress people. But look at how you do the things you do. Do you serve faithfully, ethically and in a manner to please God? What would those who work with you say about God as demonstrated by you? And do you get so engrossed in the job that you have no time for God; even to say thank You?

Something is terribly wrong, and I can’t help but laugh. But until we realize seeking the Kingdom is the reason why we exist, we shall be stuck in the rat race, chasing after these things. And let me tell you, when you get hold of these things, I hope they don’t swallow you as they tend to do, and I also hope that they bring more life to you, more hope and more joy. That is the essence of life.

Silent Night.... Really?

I don't understand how the night Jesus was born could have been a silent night. I don't understand. First of all the government being a government asks her citizens to go back to their home towns for census. It's like being asked to go shags for voting. Joseph and Mary must have been in their late teens, young in marriage and almost due for delivery. I have tried to imagine their circumstance.

I can imagine when the labor pains started and Joseph tried looking for a decent place for delivery. Delivery of God's son. And as he hustled from one inn to another, the places were fully booked. Mary must have wondered what kind of husband she had who cannot anticipate situations. I mean, he should have made earlier arrangements for his expectant, almost due wife. But I imagine he was not that sharp.

I can imagine when he came with the news that every decent place was booked and Mary was here screaming in pain. They must have panicked. I imagine what was going through her mind. How can I be delivering the savior of the world in this situation? She must have felt inadequate. And even as they decided on the cow shed, it was a decision they made out of no choice. Mary must have screamed the loudest and Joseph had no other option but to find a place to let her deliver; and it was in the manger. And who was the midwife? It must have been his not so sharp Joseph.

And then you tell me about a silent night??? Think again. I don't see any silence at all. The birth of the saviour was full of chaos, hard questions, difficult realities and trying circumstances. But in all this, He was born healthy.

And that is how most things born of God get delivered. In situations where you are not understanding the circumstances surrounding you, when the reality is difficult and the situation is not as expected. But if we keep pushing and keep the right heart posture, God will always make it happen for us. I think Mary is on of the most humble of being we read about in the bible. She is delivering the savior of the world and all she can say is .... be it unto me according to your word. And even when the worst came to worse she accepted her circumstances knowing so well that God's word must come to pass. If we lose anything else, let it not be the word we have from the Lord.

Eyeing the Things that Count

What would you do if your needs were catered for, for a whole year?

You must agree most of us are occupied everyday in what we call work but more often than not we are just on the paper chase. We are looking for money to cater for our needs and more money to make life easier, and more money so that we can afford a few luxuries. And that is okay.

Most people in my generation are concerned with amassing wealth for ourselves. We want it big, we want to make a statement, we want to be on the top of the pyramid, we want to be up there. And that too is okay.

What happened to calling? What happened to service? 

The other Saturday I had a whole day with high school students in a boys school in Murang’a. And as we were doing an afternoon session, which I was teaching about attitude, I realized no one wants to be a teacher, or a shepherd of the people of God. And as much as no one gave a reason for that, it is evidence we have lost the sense of calling. Where people would give their lives out to serve the community and leave a mark in the lives of many generations. That is not found in us anymore. 

We don’t mind serving the community so long as they compensate for hostile conditions and provide 4 by 4 for us to ride on, no wonder we have enough NGO’s. But I wonder who they are serving more; themselves or the communities.

And as life tends to do, not all of us get to become the doctors we dreamed about, and as fate would have, some actually end up becoming teachers. And since most of us are just in OCCUPATION and not following a CALL, you can excuse the state of our current generation. We are occupied all day and night, rushing through life as we try to make ends meet. But is that all; to meet ends?

What would I do for a whole year if all my needs were catered for? I would go for a holiday. Sad as it may sound, but I have realized even when I talk about serving community and blaming my lack of enough resources and time for not doing something in my society, those are just lame excuses. I have no community sense in my heart. I want to serve the community if in doing so I get served. And that explain our leadership crisis. We want to serve our people to be served.

And as I reflect on the state of my life in regards to service, calling and leadership, I can only desire for a complete metamorphosis, to drop self interest and seek to serve where I can and to capture the call in my life. And as I struggle to make ends meet, I will not neglect my part in society to leave this place a little better than I found it. And so I want to get hold of the things that matter. 

Amazing!

Isn't it amazing that this page is available to everyone who gets online and types the correct URL? Isn't it also amazing that if I wrote an email and sent it to working emails, everyone will receive the same email no matter where they are so long as they connect to their mail?

Then why do we still have a scarcity mentality? The thinking that you getting mean me not getting is so outdated. I believe there are resources for all of us, so long as we are connected and positioned right.

Isn't that amazing?

May we all experience abundance and let go of envy and that scarcity mentality that limits us to share and be generous, hoarding resourcess so that we can have more. It doesn't work like that. Give and you will always have more to give. Keep and you shall always be strained as you try to hoard. 

He who refreshes will also be refreshed. And that too is amazing!

Cowards

Does it scare you that cowards will not inherit the kingdom of God?

This means if you do everything else right; either being driven by fear and after all accomplishment still remain a coward, then you do not have a place in the Kingdom of God.

What is it that you are afraid of? Is it the fear to succeed? Is it the fear to fail? Is it the fear of making mistakes? Is it the fear to try out your idea? Is it the fear to love? Is it the fear to let go? 

Unless you learn to face your fears, you should know your fate by now. We have not been given the spirit of fear or timid, but the spirit of boldness and good courage.

Be strong and of good courage. Start doing that which you are afraid. There is nothing that beats fear than faith. Exercise your faith by taking the first step.

How do you Unwind?

Have you ever been so worked out by things and you feel you just need to see a therapist to off load? Those are the times I miss being a catholic, I would just go for confession and tell the father everything that is bothering me. But I have learnt there is nothing as therapeutic as just chatting with a friend, who listens genuinely and who creates a moment. Regardless of the activity the two of us share, in the end I just feel so refreshed and re-energized. We all need that. 

I was reading the book of Job the other day and I picked out the same. When disaster struck, Job’s friend came and sat with him seven days and seven nights without saying a word, just there with him because they could see his pain. This demonstrates the power of being there with someone and creating a moment. Later Job starts venting ( I like calling it bi**hing though am not allowed to use such words) by cursing the day he was born, asking questions about life and the troubles man faces as he tries to remain blameless. After every chapter or two of venting, we get another chapter of one of his friends trying to sober him up. And this continues for some time.

How do you vent? How do you unwind? How do you release the pressure and the tension you accumulate everyday from work and life? 

I have noted many people have not discovered the need to vent and the ways to do it. When we go back to Job, you will see the way he vents but he doesn’t charge God with any wrongdoings. We also see his friends trying to sober him up so that he doesn’t cross the borders. We also see Job recognizing the sovereignty of God especially when he tells the wife; why are you talking like a foolish woman, should we accept good from God and not trouble? I mean, Job understands God beyond his circumstances and though he vents out in anger and frustrations, he know his life is in God.

Often a time if we are lucky to have friends we can vent out with, we always fall short and cross the boundaries and we end up defiling ourselves. Some friends will go out for drinks and dancing as a way of venting and the find themselves worse off than they were. Some friends will hook up nicely just to turn into a gossip club. It is important to be vigilant.

Other people will not vent at all. They bottle things up inside them and they keep carrying heavy burdens. Life can be tough we all agree, and we don’t have the capacity to carry every load. It is wise we learnt to let go. Find something that allows you to release pressure and tension. It could be a walk in the evening, a sport, a hobby or just a silent moment away from every noise. It could be a chat with a refreshing buddy. It could be jotting down your feelings; It can also be a moment of worship and prayer, where you pour out your heart and your mind to God. Whatever it is, just make sure you have it.

And when life gets tough, always remember that Jesus is asking you to cast all your burdens to him for he cares for you. He carried all our burdens so that we can be free. And when we take up his burden, it easy and his yoke is smooth. 

But never ever bottle up things in your heart. Because according to Job, resentment kills a fool and envy slays the simple. And the wise man in proverb says; bitterness rots the bones. Let go off all bitterness, frustrations and pain, and let God be enough and sufficient for you.

Where is the power of the cross?

Every time I listen to the song My Jesus by Todd Agnew I always get challenged. Here is part of the lyrics

Which Jesus do you follow? Which Jesus do you serve? If Ephesians says to imitate Christ, then why do you look so much like the world?

If you are on social media or generally in the internet, you will see so many jokes about Jesus and God. I hear nowadays Jesus is black. Others will talk about “What Would Jesus Do?” even when in situations that Jesus would not be in the first place. And as much as some of these initiatives are great, sometimes they just demonstrate the mere lack of the fear of God in our generation.

And back to the Jesus I follow, I have been thinking closely about it. And as I was walking to work yesterday I met an old lady who was looking for the primary school in our estate. And I remember telling her to find the school just behind the mosque. Then I remembered when we were doing geography in primary school and we would recognize a Christian community through a church; which was a building marked with a cross.

Do you know how difficult it is to recognize a church nowadays? From some funny names we call church to the dingy buildings in the name of a place of worship, to the lack of the cross and the funny characters that we call shepherds. And as much as we say church is the heart and not the building, what we see leaves a lot to be desired; both from the building and from the people who are the church. Where is the power of the cross?

I have noticed we have become so casual with God, me included.  God, I know sometimes I act like we are just buddies; I mean you are the most understanding. Your mercies are new everyday and when you forgive, you truly forget. You know am human and human is to error, you know I am busy and trying to be modern, so excuse my few jokes on twitter and on email. It’s not that I am ashamed about you when I don’t share the good news with my friends online, am just avoiding spamming them. And when I attend bedside baptism, you know technology allows us much more than we can imagine. I know you understand. And when I don’t tell people about you it’s because when they watch news on Sunday evening, they get to see what your people have been up to and I don’t want to be associated with them. I know you say I should not conform to the standards of this world, and I am not, I am just trying to survive, to fit in and to be people friendly. I mean, we have to give people their space. Just keep understanding. The story can go on and on..

And as I keep on thinking about the kind of Christian I have been, I desire that God may give me a meaty heart; the heart that will walk in the fear of God, shunning evil and hiding his word deep inside so that I may not sin against him. To be transformed by the renewal of my mind. Not to fear persecution when I defend the truth. And demonstrate the power of the cross in my life in every aspect and not to be a religious freak but a real human being.

I pray that I will be willing to pay the cost for following Jesus and to carry the cross daily. Not to fulfill religious obligations, but to be a man of higher standards and a quality lifestyle powered by the Holy Spirit. And when the world looks at me, may they see the power of the Cross!

And when I listen to Todd Agnew I will be confident to declare that I follow Jesus the son of God, and not only will I say, but I will be demonstrating it with my life, and for sure I will not be ashamed that I don't look like the world.